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  • Sivonnia DeBarros

LIfe's Formula: X=VD+D

I get it. You’re saying to yourself, “what does this woman know about the formula to life?” Seems very sketchy, right. It isn’t.

A few weeks ago, I experienced a loss that shook me to my core. It also awaken and heightened my spiritual awareness around life. It wasn’t until this loss that I fully understood a previous conversation around voids and deficits. Furthermore, this loss illustrated how deposits into one’s life will set them up and apart from the masses causing their success and achievements to be inevitable.

Let me explain:

Voids are like empty holes that are missing something in which you believe you must fill for completeness. For a lot of people, that could be an absentee parent. This was true for me years ago. Regardless of that, having a void starts you from an even playing field. Let’s just call that level zero.

Deficits are the things or people that when added into your life, it takes away (or depletes) you thus leaving you far beyond having a simple void. This deficit puts you below level zero.

The beautiful thing about voids is that you have the ability to fill it with all the things or people you want to give you the satisfaction and confidence you deem necessary to move forward in life.

But there lies a danger: When you add someone who does not exhibit the tools you need or are incapable of providing what you need for growth in hopes of filling a void, they can become a deficit. Take for instance, a parent in the household but is still absentee. They take up time, space and energy and deposits nothing into your life.

Deposits are the people or things that add to your life. It gives you value. It gives you promise. It pushes you forward to a greater purpose. I like to call this Favor.

For years, I never realized that I lived with a void (no father) but was shielded from a deficit (a self-centered, greedy, and selfish father). However, my deposit (my grandmother = favor) guided me through life and was my biggest cheerleader. She helped me to become who I am today. What I realized is that I hadn’t celebrated the voids and the deposits enough. It took me losing my grandmother to realize the favor that is and was over my life.

You too can get a grasp of your life by understanding what void is present, avoiding deficits, and welcoming the deposits.

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